In a hurry? Need it now? Can’t wait? If so you’re a ripe target for advertisers and politicians making their pitch, but a Biblical proverb says, “Impatience runs into folly; advancement comes by careful thought.” (Prov. 14:17) It’s very important to think ahead and make plans for our lives plans based on good information and careful thought and then follow through to get good results, to advance.

As Seneca, the Roman philosopher, said, “Our plans miscarry because they have no aim. When a man does not know what harbor he is making for, no wind is the right wind.” Many people live their lives without a clear sense of purpose and without reasoned goals. They don’t know where they’re going, so they don’t know how to get there. Often they fall victim to a philosophy warned against in the Bible, “Let’s eat and drink, for tomorrow we die.” (1 Cor. 15:32) In fact, as a lifestyle this is a self-fulfilling premise. Grabbing the gusto often means flirting with death. Seek death, and you may find it; expect to fail, and you most likely will fail. Life should be lived, not in desperate grabs for pleasure and hasty consumption, not moment by moment, but in the context of eternity, knowing that today does make a difference for tomorrow.

Someone else has said, “More people fail through lack of purpose than through lack of talent.” We see this kind of failure everywhere around us, the failure of purpose, even in people who have achieved great power and influence only to fail in utilizing it. A life well lived requires a certainty of purpose, not hasty impatience and constantly floundering for a new direction. Certainty of purpose calls for thought and planning and gathering useful information. The most useful information any of us will ever find for planning a life well lived is in the Bible. That information, which comes from the Infinite God, deserves careful consideration. It has a proven track record of success. Advancement comes by careful thought. Read your Bible, and think carefully. Choose your harbor, and plan for the future, and then follow through to get good results and advance.

“I urge you, brothers, by our Lord Jesus Christ and by the love of the Spirit, to join me in my struggle by praying to God for me. Pray that I may be rescued from the unbelievers in Judea and that my service in Jerusalem may be acceptable to the saints there, so that by God’s will I may come to you with joy and together with you be refreshed.” (Romans 15:30-32, NIV)

When Paul was going to Jerusalem to help the poor brethren there with a generous gift from the churches of Achaia and Macedonia (Acts 20:1ff, 1 Cor. 16:1ff, 2 Cor. 8:1ff, Rom. 15:25ff), he had three serious concerns about things that might affect the completion of his trip when he arrived in Jerusalem with the gift in hand. He wrote about his concerns to the Corinthian church from Macedonia (2 Cor. 8:1-15, 20-21) and the Roman church while in Corinth (Rom. 15:30-32).

One area of evident concern to Paul as he worked his way toward Jerusalem was whether the churches that had been eager to start the effort would in fact finish with enthusiasm. This was a major concern when Paul wrote to the Corinthians about this service (2 Cor. 8:1-15). Would the brethren finish what they started or fail to live up to their promises and so bring a reproach on the name of Christ?

Later, by the time Paul was writing Romans, he had seen success in that regard. Believers in Macedonia and Achaia had carried through and given generously for the saints in Jerusalem. So Paul wrote asking the brethren at Rome to join him and help him in prayer, that he might be rescued from the unbelievers, those hostile to the gospel of Jesus Christ. He wanted the Roman believers to pray about that, joining in his struggle by prayer so that the hostility and plots of unbelievers could not overwhelm him or destroy his work for the Lord. There is little use in being concerned over the world’s response to Christian endeavor until there is Christian endeavor. Often saints seem to get their concerns mixed up, and worry about how the world will react “if” we do something, rather than determining to do what is right, and then prayerfully struggle against the opposition. Paul did not seem to lose sleep over what “might” happen “if” the Christians did what they should, before they’d done it. Instead he first concentrated on getting Christians to do what they should and then worked on confronting the obstacles that necessarily must arise as the Christian endeavor came to fruition. Of course prayer, his own and that of other believers, was an integral part of how he prepared to face the rising hostility of unbelievers in the face of Christian service. And so Paul was concerned about the hostility of unbelievers he would face in delivering the gift of the churches to the Christians in Jerusalem, after the churches had in fact provided the gift.

In the same manner, if we understand the path that Paul followed here, we will be concerned about obstacles imposed by unbelievers, but only in the context of being sure that something is being done for the Lord that might provoke opposition. If we first become concerned about the possible opposition of unbelievers, instead of first being concerned about Christian commitment and endeavor, then we will certainly neglect the work that ought to be done. That is one lesson here, that Christians should determine to do what is right and then bolster themselves and one another by prayer in order to face the world’s consequences.

There is another lesson in the passages in Romans and Corinthians though, that we ought to take serious note of. Paul’s other concern at the time of his writing, besides being finishing the work and being rescued from unbelievers. His other concern, for which he solicited planning and prayer, was that his service would be “acceptable to the saints,” to do what is right “in the eyes of the Lord” and “also in the eyes of men.” It might seem strange that this would be a concern at all, that Christians might find unacceptable a gift of love from other Christians in a time of need, that Christians might reject or criticize a service by an apostle and other servants of Jesus Christ, and yet Paul had very real concern that the Jerusalem Christians or other brethren might indeed find this service unacceptable. He had so much concern that he asked several churches to send representatives and asked another body of believers hundreds of miles away, many of them strangers to him, to join him in his struggle by praying about this.

Perhaps there are at least a couple of points we can see in Paul’s concern here and how he dealt with it. For one thing, we can learn not to be naive about people’s (believers’) feelings, to think through what our actions may cause others to feel, how we may be perceived by them even in doing right. Paul was not one to press blindly ahead doing “the right thing” with no concern for how his actions would be perceived by others. A significant factor in his work of gathering the gift for the Jerusalem Christians had been a desire to bind Jewish and Gentile churches more closely together, and that would not be accomplished if the Jewish Christians of Jerusalem found him or this gift unacceptable. He wanted God’s help to present even a gift in a way acceptable to the church, in a way that would foster peace and harmony. Paul would need God’s help to finish this work in a way that was good for the church, no matter whether it seemed obviously good or not.

God’s servants today need an awareness as well that their good may be evil spoken of or poorly received, even by saints, and that they must be prayerfully concerned to work in such a way as to be acceptable to the saints. Gifts or services delivered without thought for the feelings of the recipients will all too often stir feelings of distrust or resentment. Christian workers must anticipate human reaction and approach believers with a prayerful desire for approval, that their service be acceptable to the saints.

On the other hand, we should also realize that Paul’s concern that his service be acceptable did not overwhelm his determination to do what he understood as the Lord’s will. He didn’t take a survey and get an approval rating from believers (or unbelievers) before he set out to do it. He wasn’t so concerned about acceptability that he reinterpreted God’s will on that basis, but he was very concerned that in doing God’s will he be able, in his struggle, to present his service in a way that would be acceptable.

And still there is another thought here worth noticing. We can learn the lesson of Paul’s attitude as servants of God, that we do God’s work and not be hindered by hostility from unbelievers, that we concern ourselves with working in a way that will be helpful to the brethren because they find it acceptable, that we solicit God’s help by our prayers and solicit the prayers of others. But we also need to learn from Paul’s expectations of others, even the saints. Are our hearts softened by the touch of God so that we try to find the services of Jesus’ servants acceptable? Are we responsive to the will of God in receiving the services of those he uses, or do we hinder their work and destroy their joy with various forms of negativism and hostility? Paul’s ongoing work, his effectiveness and his joy, depended on both being rescued from unbelievers and being acceptable to the saints. If some servant of God is endeavoring to help you or I, individually or congregationally, can we yield ourselves to the will of God, finding that service acceptable, and remembering that before his own master he stands or falls (Rom. 14:4)? With the help of God, in fact, we can.

32 And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel and the prophets, 33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, 34 quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. 35 Women received back their dead, raised to life again. Others were tortured and refused to be released, so that they might gain a better resurrection. 36 Some faced jeers and flogging, while still others were chained and put in prison. 37 They were stoned; they were sawed in two; they were put to death by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated–38 the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, and in caves and holes in the ground.(Heb 11:32-38 NIV)

A politician recently was quoted as saying that when he decided to enter politics his mother advised him to “be tough, but don’t become hard.” She gave him good advice. One definition of tough is “Able to withstand great strain without tearing or breaking; strong and resilient.” This is the quality that, according to Hebrews 11, faith imparts to human lives. Not just faith in something or anything, but faith in God, the creator and redeemer. Faith in God makes people tough, enables them (us) to withstand great strain without breaking or tearing. Godly people have been able to endure pain, grief, and loss of every kind imaginable, and not just endure, but triumph over it, because of their certainty that God is there and he cares. By faith, Christians are equipped for survival. Characters like Abraham, Sarah, Rahab and Gideon faced a dangerous and often ugly world with winning toughness. They could face dangers, losses, and radical changes in their world and go on, because they had faith, and faith made them tough.

It’s good to be tough strong and resilient.
No one ever was tougher than a man named Jesus. His original disciples and those who’ve come to him through the ages have learned from him to be tough, to say like Paul “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” and “I can do all things through him who gives me strength” (Phil. 4:11b, 13). Nevertheless, being tough doesn’t mean not caring and it doesn’t mean not hurting. Followers of Jesus do not learn from him to be hard impenetrable, uncaring or unfeeling. Jesus was tough enough to deal with the cross, but was deeply affected by the pain and isolation of his suffering, and soft enough to take care of his mother and forgive his tormentors. He was tough, but not hard. He still experienced all the pain of his situation, and coped with it, and he still cared about crucified robbers and confused followers.

Everyone needs to be tough strong and resilient, and no one should be hard uncaring, unfeeling,impenetrable. And Christians have the resources to be both tough and caring. Like the followers of God in other eras, our weakness can be turned into strength (Heb. 11:34) and we can become powerful.The same God who made them tough toughens still. The same faith that transformed them transforms still.

One Tough Lady
Rahab is mentioned in Heb. 11:31 as an example of faith. She’s also mentioned in James 2:25 in a similar context coupling faith with action, and in Matt. 1:5 in the genealogy of Jesus. She was the mother of Boaz who married Ruth, the great-great-grandmother of King David. Her position of honor in scripture is remarkable, especially considering that she is first introduced to us as a Canaanite prostitute living in a condemned city (Joshua 2). In fact, despite her cooperation with Joshua’s spies and her expressed confidence that Israel would win the coming battle, which greatly encouraged the morale of Israel (Joshua 2:8ff, 2:23ff), Rahab was not readily accepted into Israel, but was treated as an unwelcome foreigner, a second class person who didn’t belong in the camp of God’s people (Joshua 6:22-23), an outsider. But Rahab, the untrained woman of faith with the unacceptable background, was tough enough to turn her back on her whole world, tough enough to reject Jericho and embrace God, and tough enough to face a skeptical and cold reception from those she had joined. Rahab was tough enough to provide for her family (Joshua 2:12-13 & 6:22-23) at great personal risk. Tough enough to face days of uninformed confinement as she waited for Israel’s victory (Joshua 2:19) and keep the secret required of her. Tough enough to face, not a hero’s welcome, but unfriendly rejection from those she’d aided. And tough enough to stick it out and start a new life among the Israelites who didn’t want her, earning their respect and establishing a family of her own with a tribal leader from the family of Judah. Rahab was one tough lady, tough because of her faith in God, and tough (not hard) because she cared about her family and her own future.

Have you ever had the experience of being verbally blasted, embarrassed, humiliated, or insulted and then placated with an absurd, “but don’t take it personally.”? Rarely is the phrase used unless in fact something very personal and probably painful has been said. Seldom are we told not to “take it personally” unless that is about the only way we can “take it”.

In actual fact though, despite the circumstances in which such an instruction is often given, Christians, and especially church leaders, can seldom afford to “take it personally.” Their responsibility is to respond in a genuinely Christ-like manner, mindful of the good shepherd’s perceptions and priorities. When he was abused, verbally or otherwise, he did not take it personally (1 Pet. 2:23, or Luke 13:10-17 for example). Never did Jesus say or imply, “how dare you say that to me?”, but always he dealt with the insults and objections of others as though they required a reasoned response and clear teaching, or else simple forgiveness recognizing that “they know not what they do.” Those who are his representatives in this world must likewise learn to respond to insult or injury without “taking it personally” whether or not it was in fact meant personally. Christians should rarely take offense at the words of others, whether brethren or otherwise, and should never respond in kind to hurtful remarks or unsympathetic criticisms. When we are consumed with a zeal to respond, we must be sure that it is “zeal for your house” (John 2:17) and not zeal for our own dignity or our own defense.

What is true of Christians in this regard is even more stringently demanded of appointed church leaders; evangelists, elders, and deacons. Of those who are “masters” or teachers, much is required, especially in the consideration of verbal responses (James 3). Paul directed Timothy to “gently instruct” those who oppose him (2 Tim. 2:24-26), in the hope that they would come to their senses and be saved. This becomes impossible when the evangelist, or the elder, has taken personal offense and let his own perceived dignity interfere with his Godly responsibility. In his other epistles, those to the churches, Paul never said to any of them, or of any of them, “I’ve been offended, I need an apology.” On the contrary, he labored to avoid having any perceived personal offence detract from the advancement of the gospel of Christ and the salvation of souls.

In his letters to the Corinthians Paul certainly had cause to blame them for personal offenses, had every reason to “take it personally” since they had in fact directed attacks against him personally. He could have taken offense for personal attacks, or for attacks on his God given office, but instead he saw the overriding need for explanation, for appeal, for encouragement to see things as God does. He was truly and deeply hurting because of the Corinthian situation (2 Cor. 2:4) but what he wanted to communicate to them was that his love for them survived, that it was his depth of love that caused the pain of concern for them, and not feelings of pride or anguish over being personally attacked. All who lead in the Lord’s church must aspire to handle offenses as Paul instructed, and as he demonstrated, which is to say, in imitation of Christ’s own behavior. The person who is thought to be a church leader, and yet “takes things personally”, becoming offended by the words or actions of others, needs to reexamine their own spiritual maturity and whether they are really capable of offering leadership to God’s people. One who is full of self-pity, wounded pride, or bitter recriminations can seldom accomplish the goals of eldership (Titus 1:9-11 or 1 Pet. 5:1-4), the mission of evangelism (1 Cor. 9:19-22) or the service of deaconing (Acts 6:1-7). There just is no room in the job descriptions of church leaders for “taking things personally”.

If church leaders (or maturing Christians in general) cannot “take things personally”, how can they learn to do otherwise? There are several answers that have merit, beginning with the need to get better acquainted with Jesus Christ and learn a new appreciation for what he came to do. Seeing people as he saw them, as sheep without a shepherd for example, and seeing the value of every individual human being, as he did, can help us a lot in overcoming the tendency to feel insulted. A realistic consideration of the weaknesses, strengths, values, and needs of other human beings will often put “personal insult” into the ridiculous category it belongs in. Our egos should be strong in Christ, not weak and fearful in ourselves. Furthermore, when we feel insulted or inclined to “take it personally” we should realistically consider whether we are not in fact afraid that some criticism or accusation may be true. Perhaps the real hurt and anger comes from within ourselves, and not from words or actions authored by someone else. Jesus had tremendous confidence (call it faith!) in his own standing with God and would not be easily thrown into a panic or a rage by the slander of others. Our own confidence (faith!) in God’s care and involvement in our lives is the best refuge against a rebellious ego feeling threatened by someone else’s words or actions.

If we are to grow up in Christ, each of us doing our part for the good of the whole body, then we must outgrow the natural tendency to “take things personally” and instead take things as children of God, secure in our relationship to Him, not needing to defend our dignity or require apologies. And those who lead, most of all, must lead as Christ led, dismissing insult and offense and getting on with the challenging job of saving and keeping souls in Christ. If we are to fear anything, let’s not fear criticism or disagreement (Prov. 9:8), but fear rather the potential harm of letting personal feelings govern our response to other people, people loved by God and needing a Godly response.

Ages ago Aesop told the story of a dog crossing a bridge over a stream with a piece of meat in his mouth. The dog saw his own reflection in the water and thought it was another dog, with an even bigger piece of meat than his own. Bold and aggressive, he immediately jumped to attack the other dog and win the larger piece of meat, dropping his own as he lunged. He thus lost both: that which he grasped at in the water, because it was not real, but only a reflection; and his own, because the stream swept it away.

Aesop wanted to stir our thoughts with this little story to realize among other things that we should appreciate what we have, that in craving what others have we lose, that greed or lust is a motivator that destroys more than it produces. The dog in Aesop’s fable is rather like the people the Bible speaks of who “don’t care anymore about right and wrong and have given themselves over to impure ways. They stop at nothing, being driven by their evil minds and reckless lusts.” (Eph 4:19 TLB)

Aesop’s dog, like too many people, wasn’t troubled with an inconvenient conscience, wasn’t bothered by notions of right and wrong, and so was freely driven by appetite. Inevitably, this sort of freedom from guilt really becomes slavery to appetite or passion that can never be satisfied. The question of the moment becomes “Can I get away with it?” rather than “Is it right?” In time, “getting away with it” may become an assumption rather than a question, but there will always be something else to lunge for, and always something lost that may be irreplaceable. “For wherever there is jealousy or selfish ambition, there will be disorder and every other kind of evil.” (James 3:16 TLB)

Solomon observed that “The righteous has enough to satisfy his appetite, but the stomach of the wicked is in want.” (Prov 13:25 NAS) His point was probably not that the righteous have more than the wicked, many other passages of scripture observe that wrongdoers often seem very materially successful. Rather, Solomon’s point seems to be that the righteous know satisfaction with what they have, and the wicked always want more. This is true in the areas of possessions, and relationships, and sensuality, and power. But for those who know God, contentment is not based on what one has compared to another, but on confidence in Him who has all things. The writer of Hebrews said, “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'” (Heb 13:5 NIV) The one who has this confidence need not be ruled by appetite or passion, but can in fact be satisfied with the good things at hand, rather than always lunging for the illusion of something more.

Matt 12:39 But He answered and said to them, “An evil and adulterous generation craves for a sign; and {yet} no sign shall be given to it but the sign of Jonah the prophet; 40 for just as Jonah was three days and three nights in the belly of the sea monster, so shall the Son of Man be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth. (NAS)

Heb 9:8 The Holy Spirit {is} signifying this, that the way into the holy place has not yet been disclosed, while the outer tabernacle is still standing, 9 which {is} a symbol for the present time. Accordingly both gifts and sacrifices are offered which cannot make the worshiper perfect in conscience, (NAS)

Heb 10:1 For the Law, since it has {only} a shadow of the good things to come {and} not the very form of things, can never by the same sacrifices year by year, which they offer continually, make perfect those who draw near. (NAS)

Following is a list of some Biblical ceremonies, events, places, and people treated as signs or prophetic “types” in the New Testament:

1. Manna, Ex. 16 – Jesus, the true bread from heaven, John 6:25ff
2. The bronze snake, Num. 21:4-9 – Jesus, lifted up on the cross to cure sin, John 3:14-15
3. Jonah in the great fish, Jonah 1:17-2:10 – Jesus in the tomb, Matt. 12:39-41
4. Solomon’s gift of wisdom, 1 Kings 10 – Jesus who is wisdom, Matt. 12:42-43, 1 Cor. 1:30
5. The passover lamb, Ex. 12:1ff – Jesus, the Lamb of God, 1 Cor. 5:7
6. The feast of unleavened bread, Ex. 12:15-20 – Christian purity, 1 Cor. 5:6-7
7. The flood in Noah’s day, Gen. 6-8 – Christ’s return and judgment, Matt. 24:36-41, 2 Pet. 3:3-7
8. Crossing the Red Sea, Ex. 14 – baptism into Christ, 1 Cor. 10:1-4
9. The guiding pillar of cloud, Ex. 14 – Jesus guidance and protection, 1 Cor. 10:1-4
10. Water from the rock, Ex. 17:1-7 – Jesus’ presence and provision, 1 Cor. 10:1-4
11. Moses the faithful servant, Deut. 34;10-12 – Jesus the faithful son, Heb. 3:5
12. Priesthood of Melchizedek, Gen. 14:18-20 – High priesthood of Christ, Heb. 5:6ff
13. Jerusalem, 2 Sam. 5:6-10 – The church, Heb. 12:22
14. Babylon, Daniel 1-6 – The nonChristian kingdom of this world, Rev. 17:1-18
15. Hagar and Sarah, Gen. 16, 21:8-21 – Those under law and those freed by the Spirit, Gal. 4:21-31
16. The tabernacle, Ex. 25-28 – heavenly access by Jesus’ ministry, Heb.8:5, 9:8-10
17. Elijah, 2 Kings 17 – 2 Kings 2:18 – John the Baptizer, Matt. 17:10-13
18. King David, 1 Sam. 16ff – King Jesus, Acts 2:25-35
19. Abraham, Gen. 15:6 – Those who are saved by faith in Jesus, Rom. 4
20. Adam who brought death, Gen. 3 – Christ who brings life, Rom. 5:12ff
21. Oil for lamps and anointing, Ex. 27:20-21, 29:7 – The Holy Spirit, Acts 10:38, Luke 4:18, Acts 2:33

This list of signs, symbols, and shadows is not an exhaustive list of those specifically mentioned in the New Testament, nor certainly of those found by consistent study of the Hebrew scriptures, but is an illustration of how the Hebrew scriptures were explored, utilized, and taught by the preachers and writers of the New Testament. “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.” (Romans 15:4 NIV)

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. (Ps 23:4 NIV)

But the LORD is with me like a mighty warrior; so my persecutors will stumble and not prevail. They will fail and be thoroughly disgraced; their dishonor will never be forgotten. (Jer 20:11 NIV)

The LORD promised Joshua, “No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Josh 1:5 NIV) And then God told Joshua to “be strong and courageous” (Josh 1:6, 7). Joshua’s strength and courage were to be firmly based on the assurance that God would be with him, would never leave him nor forsake him. And Joshua could be certain of that because he’d seen how it was between God and Moses. Joshua would have no delusions of ease or lack of conflict in this promise of God’s presence, he had seen indeed how it was with Moses, that Moses faced great adversity as God’s man, felt isolation and frustration in dealing with uncooperative and recalcitrant people. God wasn’t promising Joshua a trouble free life or a life without conflict, he was guaranteeing a victorious life, a life of overcoming adversity and conflict, because God would be his companion. The assurance was that God would be with him in conflict, not that God would insulate him from it. And so Joshua truly could conduct himself with courage and confidence, never to be bluffed out by any setback or difficulty.

God’s promise to Joshua, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” is echoed in Jesus’ words of farewell to his disciples, “surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (Matt 28:20b NIV) Jesus’ promise of an abiding presence with his disciples, like the promise given to Joshua, is a promise of joint victory over hardship, not an exemption from it. The certainty of Jesus presence is to embolden his followers to behave as he did, knowing that they may also be called on to suffer as he did, and knowing that as he has overcome and sat down with the Father, so shall those who endure with him and overcome with him share in his glory (Rev. 3:21).

An old song asked the question, “Have you ever been lonely, have you ever been blue?” Surely every thinking feeling person has felt lonely and blue. Three thousand years ago the Psalmist appealed to God, “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish.” (Ps 25:16-17 NIV) Truly, loneliness and depression are appropriately described as anguish and affliction, inflicting deep suffering on those who experience them. It is natural to crave deliverance from loneliness and a troubled heart, and going to one who is greater, who understands and has answers, is the way to find relief.

In fact, God is pictured in the Psalms as providing a solution to loneliness, both spiritually and practically. God’s concern for the lonely is shown in the description of God as a father and builder of families. “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families, he leads forth the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sunscorched land.” (Ps 68:56 NIV). The Psalmist found that God himself is a spiritual companion, a father, that anyone can find comfort with when human companionship is missing. Besides this spiritual consolation though, the Psalmist said that “God sets the lonely in families.” One of the ways that God does this is through the “family of believers,” people who share faith in God and so share companionship and family obligations with one another. “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” (Gal 6:10 NIV) God’s people are to be a family for each other, and so are to help one another overcome loneliness. This is a great asset for winning the struggle with loneliness and depression. God sets the lonely in families by providing a new kind of family for them, a family bound by common faith and goals rather than by genetics, a growing family that is never to abandon the needy or troubled, but is to join together in doing good.

Not that either loneliness or a troubled heart are always bad. Sometimes loneliness for a time can be a benefit, a useful deprivation that lends focus and clarity to our thinking. Jesus knew the value of temporary solitude and loneliness for communing with the Father, as in Luke 5:16, “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” Prolonged loneliness can be debilitating, but short periods of loneliness can also be a blessing, if used as an opportunity for reflection, for introspection, for prayer. Likewise prolonged depression is devastating but a troubled heart may be helpful if it helps a person recognize a need for change or provokes a needed action. The needed action in many cases might be putting confidence in God who has provided spiritual and practical relief from prolonged loneliness or depression. That relief is found in knowing the assurances of his promises, and being in the family of believers that he has produced for the support of all who have ever been lonely or blue.

Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy. A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world. So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.” (John 16:20-22, NIV)

Death brings grief to the living – which can seem dreadful to experience–but a certain amount of grief is healthy and beneficial. Grief is a natural, appropriate and necessary part of our lives. Long ago the Preacher said, “It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of every man; the living should take this to heart. Sorrow is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure.” (Eccl. 7:2-4, NIV)

In writing those words Solomon was telling us that we need to face reality, for the sake of our own mental health and emotional well-being, and eternal preparedness. One important reality or truth is that we live with death. Death hangs over us all, all of the time. We live in an unsafe world. This truth should not be dismissed or denied, it should be faced and dealt with by conscious preparation. It is a mistake to have our hearts set on pleasure, escape, or entertainment. While these things may enable us to forget reality briefly, reality surrounds us and will again intrude on our lives, and we will (still) be unprepared to deal with it. Like it or not, all of us are directly confronted with death from time to time–the death of those we love, and the possibility of our own. Flesh is fragile and easily destroyed.

One of the many things the Christian faith and church are designed to do is to help disciples cope with grief, and in fact transform grief into joy. Prior to his own death Jesus said that his disciples would certainly grieve, but that it would be temporary. He said, “You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy,” and “Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.” (John 16:20b, 22, NIV) The promise of life beyond death doesn’t abolish grief, but it provides the means of transforming grief into joy. This promise assures that there is genuine meaning in life, that it does all matter, that each person does truly count for something. Knowing the assurance of the resurrection, and the loving-kindness of God, Christians can experience grief without being swallowed by it, can know the emotional cleansing that grief brings about, followed by the spiritual healing of grief turned to joy, joy in ongoing life.

Christians “believe that Jesus died and rose again” and that “the dead in Christ will rise” (1 Thess. 4:14, 16). That assurance is to enable Christians to cope with grief, so that they will not “grieve like the rest of mankind that has no hope,” (1 Thess. 4:13), but rather find spiritual and emotional healing in faith, and the loving support of other believers, so that in time grief is turned to joy, not by escape into trivial pleasures, but by confidence in Christ Jesus.

(Note: An excellent book exploring grief and faith from the inside out is A Grief Observed, by C. S. Lewis. This short book is a sort of journal Lewis wrote after his wife died of cancer and, experience tells me, it is an accurate picture of the often painful process of grief believers go through as they move toward realizing joy.)